the lie of marrying yourself

Yeah...

I have been coming up against the paradigm shift.

In the 50's.. women struggled for identity.. Society seemed to be very regimented..
Roles were set in stone.. expectations were that you would play out a role.

Many were finding they were unfufilled.. and many had to be sedated
to live through that decade (and probably in previous decades as well)

then the 60's set everyone "free" boundaries were tested and exploded
the 70's set into the ME decade.. and the 80's continued that self
actualization of "selfishness" and "prosperity" we still struggled to
find our proper "roles"..

90's.... materialism grew.. Wealth abounded.... and we thought it would never
end. Relationships reflected that new found wealth. Couple never married
Women were now their own bread winners. We didn't need each other
anymore.....

and then 9/11.. and fear.. the cross roads of our choices... folks started
to question what really mattered. .We felt oppressed and re evaluated things
and then the economic crash.. and we continue the road of reflection...

it is an evolution... and it is about shattering the myths of the 50's and the myths of the
90's!.. The Myth we have prescribed roles and the myth that we should all be
our own independent universes....

Both are wrong...

We need to be authentic and able to be healthy and communicate well and understand
our needs and wants and know what we can realistically do and cannot do
we need to enter into healthy relationships with that mature understanding
and we should not have to expect to be alone.. figuring things out by ourselves
being separate from each other as PROOF we are Self actualized beings in our
own little universes without love and companionship and community.

We have been told a lot of LIES about the self and relationships.

and we are wiping the crud from our tear stained eyes... and we just are
trying to figure it all out.!

From Hedwig and the Angry Inch

When the earth was still flat
And clouds made of fire
And mountains stretched up to the sky
Sometimes higher
Folks roamed the earth like big rolling kegs
They had two sets of arms
They had two sets of legs
They had two faces peering
Out of one giant head
So they could watch all around them
As they talked; while they read
And they never knew nothing of love
It was before the origin of love
The origin of love

And there were three sexes then,
One that looked like two men
Glued up back to back
Called the children of the sun
And similiar in shape and girth
Were the children of the earth
They looked like two girls rolled up in one
And the children of the moon
Were like a fork shoved on a spoon
They were part sun, part earth, part daughter, part son
The origin of love

Now the gods grew quite scared
Of our strength and defiance
And Thor said "I'm gonna kill them all with my hammer
Like I killed the giants"
And Zeus said "No
You better let me use my lightning like scissors
Like I cut the legs off the whales
And dinosaurs into lizards"
Then he grabbed up some bolts
And he let out a laugh
Said "I'll split them right down the middle
Gonna cut them right up in half"
And the storm clouds gathered above
Into great balls of fire.

And then fire shot down from the sky in bolts
Like shining blades of a knife
And it ripped right through the flesh
Of the children of the sun and the moon
And the earth
And some Indian god sewed the wound up
Into a hole
Pulled it 'round to our bellies
To remind us the price we pay
And Osiris and the gods of the nile
Gathered up a big storm
To blow a hurricane
To scatter us away
A Flood of wind and rain
And a sea of tidal waves
To wash us all away
And if we don't behave
They'll cut us down again
We'll be walking around on one foot
And looking through one eye

The last time I saw you
We had just split in two
You were looking at me
I was looking at you
You had a way so familiar
But I could not recognize
'cause you had blood in your face
And I had blood in my eyes
But I could swear by your expression
That the pain down in your soul
Was the same as the one down in mine
That's the pain
That cuts a straight line down through the heart
We call it love
So we wrapped our arms around each other
Trying to shove ourselves back together
We were making love
Making love
It was a cold dark evening such a long time ago
When by the might hand of Jove
It was a sad story how we became
Lonely two-legged creatures
It's the story
The origin of love
That's the origin of love