Weird Perception

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groks

Check this out, this is a weird story. I was sitting in Barnes and Noble today reading a book. You know just killing time right. I look up from my book to rest my eyes for a minute and the strangest feeling over takes me, almost like a sad, angry dispair. I was sitting in my chair looking around at the store, the speakers were playing a soft kind of relaxing jazzy number. Almost like elevator music but not as bad. And for some reason to me it sounded sinister, like it was intentionally lulling us to ease. Stay calm, buy a book you know. I just sat there in some kind of weird dream like euphoric state of awe and watched all the shoppers come and go. All in their little worlds, shopping and what not. It all seemed orchrestrated to me. I don't know why, really. It was like an acid trip or something. None of it seemed real, but I knew it was. I was thinking like, these people aren't real. None of them are. I am the only real person here. It was really weird, sounds like shrooms doesn't it. Or something like that. I wanted to destroy the calmness of the store at that moment you know. The serenity of it pissed me off. I thought about how everyone would react if I just chunked my book across the store and yelled at the top of my lungs
"This is Bullshit!"
then I laughed out loud and got a couple of weird looks. Every one was just so suppressed it seemed like. It was like I snapped out of a trance and everyone else was still enamored. Weird. I've never done acid so it wasn't a flashback. I don't know what it was. Just thought I'd share it with all of you. Just a weird moment in my not so ordinary life I guess.

Comments

I can't really go to stores like that for the reason you state..

Thanks, Mike, for sharing your experience of 'birthing' out of the cultural trance. Don't worry, it's completely normal. Eventually you will be very glad that you know what's real.
I often think that these 'lone wolf' folks have a similar experience, but their background consciousness is very fragile and fear-based, so they can't let it just be an internal awareness. And there is a far cry between "This is Bullshit!" and actual physical violence.
I often think of families, such as my sister's (3 teens these days), and guess that keeping busy with drill squad coaching makes it easier to ignore everything you say--the absurd orchestration of mass commercial consumer culture.

Don't go back to sleep.

We're here for you.

Kimberella of Albuquerque

Funny you say that

I had that same exact experience yesterday at Barnes and Nobles, at least the part about thinking "Oh man they're brainwashing me with this music" and I thought about how they are displaying what they want me to read and keeping out the "bad" stuff....

"With great power comes great responsibility." - Stan Lee (via Peter Parker)

Don't let the creepy corporate trance get you down.

Those box stores are always really creepy. They use the same formula everywhere they go without taking into account the uniqueness of whatever city they build that crap in. Maybe your local independent book store is better.

Across the board people are waking up to the ludicrousness that we've accepted as business as usual for way too long. We are more than little machines that make other people money.

Just dont be too hard on the zombie ritual. Its that music! They play it in the supermarket too. But in clothing stores its more flashy.

agreed.

i grew up in a house where people liked to pretend that the sun was always shining, that bad people did bad things and that we should run away from the things we fear.

that is why i am always running from danger in my dreams and fear the dark and am always concerned something will materialize out of the darkness, something that i won't be able to control.

and maybe that's it--even if we can't control the light side of things, we can at least make easy peace, and it will leave us alone, won't cause any troubles. with the dark side, we can run as far as we might, but it's always just sitting in our shadow, waiting to finally be accepted.

so maybe i need to accept the horrors i am capable of. and the strange day dreams i had as a child, where i would think about how easy it would be to kill someone and just walk on out into the world, disappearing into the chaos and confusion.

i like that this site can't avoid confrontation and can't white wash everything. i like that there are chirping voices from every direction, and not one perspective wins out. i know you stir up a lot of shit, but i get it.

and you're right--it is necessary. just as others are right--it does suck to feel like someone is out to get you.

until we accept it all, we're just pissing in the wind...but i guess that's all we're ever doing anyway...

so we can't all just be nice, and we can't make everything pretty and perfect and cozy. we can only learn to embrace even that which we hate within ourselves and to understand that I am That means I am Everything, including you, even if i can't stand you, even if you are george w. bush, even if, even if, even if...

namaste.

hmmmmm

Rudy your so outspoken dude I love it, lol. I agree with beck though. Embrace who you are, whoever you are. Light and darkness go hand in hand. We have both qualities in each and everyone of us. What makes us good or bad is what we do everyday. What we choose to do. That's all there is. There's a quote from the movie Kingdom of Heaven I like a lot that touches on this (illwill may not like this sorry man)

"I put no stock in religion. By the word religion I have seen the lunacy of fanatics of every denomination be called the will of god. I have seen too much religion in the eyes of too many murderers. Holiness is in right action, and courage on behalf of those who cannot defend themselves, and goodness. What god desires is here
[points to head]
and here
[points to heart]
and what you decide to do every day, you will be a good man - or not."

just a thought

but I also believe that darkness has a part to play in all this as well. Unfortunatley maybe we need evil to define what is good, at least in this exsistance. If earth was like heaven why wouldn't we just stay here?

hey

wow... I thought I was the only one going to barnes and noble to loiter and read the books without buying. No wonder I'm here hanging out with all yuse guys.

illwill... you might want to rethink that idea about needing evil in order to define good. If you believe in an omnipotent god, you pretty much need a reason why he would create evil. Whether it's a test or not, It boils down to the same thing essentially. But then again maybe I am too stupid to understand it.

And I'm glad that Christ still loves me even though I'm not entirely sure that he exists. Hopefully being a good person and trying my best to love and help others is good enough for me not to have my intestines chewed on and piss and shit coming out of my mouth for eternity. Hey man, I'm all about the love.

Cheers,

Meade

I know exactly what you mean

Far too often I've sat in a starbucks or at the university library and watched people cluelessly walk in and walk out, unaware they're being watched, and then I notice that I'm the only one looking around. Everyone is either talking to a friend or on their laptop or doing something. Why do we always have to have an action? Why do cigarette smokers need a cigarette for them to turn off for a few minutes?

I thought of this the other day when I was at the computer lab on campus, in perfect rectangles staring at bright rectangles typing on rectangles. I felt like a bee in a hive. I popped my head up and looked around, everyone's heads were down. I caught someone's eye doing the same thing and they ducked. Why?

What the fuck is going on?

yeah.....

what the fuck indeed man.

Sounds like another

Sounds like another near-life experience in suburbia. Love your reaction, I would have felt the same.

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