Dancing with God.

Hello Evolvers, I know I have been away for a very long time. I miss the commune with you all and look forward to reuniting with the flock next year. The reason for my absence is a book I am writing. It is actually three separate books tied into one. Here for your amusement is a copy of the preface for book one. I will add the preface for book two and three later.

Namaste, from fear to love, we become more....

DANCING WITH GOD, " a search for unconditional love..."

Preface
(draft)
Dancing With God, offers for your consideration the many lessons I have learned in my personal search for unconditional love. The most beautiful thing we all have in common is the inherent desire to share love. Is it your wish to better comprehend what love really is? If so, may these words offer you a bridge to the bliss of unconditional love.
Together, we will journey down many seldom traveled roads of truth. The only thing you will have to pack for this trip is an open mind. I feel it is incumbent on me to establish my authority prior to starting the engine. After all, you should know the chauffeur. You will not find me in a robe or white coat, I am not a spiritual master, nor am I a scientist. I think I am a pretty smart person, but then again, don't we all. I am not a guru or teacher. I cannot, and do not, wish to lead you anywhere. Like you, I am a very regular person. I work hard in support of my family, rent my home, pay the bills and try to lead a good life. I have never concerned myself with the material world, instead, I chose a path of learning. I should say this path chose me. For when I was twenty, I came to the realization that I very much did not like myself. These feelings caused me great anxiety, I truly wanted to love myself and others. Moreover, I wanted people to love me. After much consideration, I realized I would have to tear this thing called Christopher down. This radical course of action was my only chance at rebuilding a completely different person. I vowed to remain resolute in the search for love. This is the story of my quest for the Holy Grail.

I began my journey with the only thing I knew, Catholicism. I revived my dusty old bible feeling confident a quick recap then a few conversations with our town priest and I would be well on my way. Little did I know these were only the first small steps to a life long adventure. I searched through the New and Old Testament, seeking truth and love. Over and over I read these texts, I found the words of Jesus to be beautiful. However, in my opinion, the truth of Jesus was sullied by the separation insisted upon by the church. Concepts of us and them, good and bad, heaven and hell were, in my view, not compatible with the messages delivered by Jesus of peace, forgiveness, unconditional love and unity. When trying to resolve these inconsistencies with priests I found they could not speak to my specific concerns. Instead they spoke of unconditional faith and acceptance of the word of God. I was left disappointed and unquenched, I knew the only message I could accept would have to include all people and all religions. The only solution which made any sense was to peer into some of the many other world religions. It took me about five years to discover all religions are beautiful in their own way. They all have good messages, but they also all offer two glaring flaws. Firstly, all religions express their word as the only truth. As a result, they lay claim to a singular understanding of God's intent. Secondly all religions use a carrot and stick. Catholicism, like many religions use heaven and hell, but even if the concept of hell is not present subtler versions like karma exist. These are not mere trivialities which can be swept away. If you feel your God to be standing in judgment separate from you, then by extension, you must accept yourself as a puppet to the whim of God. If you trust in reward and punishment then you must accept a God in possession of judgmental wrath. Jesus tells us to love unconditionally, to not judge, that God exists in each and every one of us, that we are all brothers. Why then should we accept a religion which speaks of a God which separates and judges us? How can we accept that God should act with emotions of anger and retribution when we know these to be deeds of ignorance? In time, I had assembled in my mind, enough truth to further fuel my search. I knew world religions were not enough, I had to find more. I turned my attention to philosophy. Finding new roads to love seemed easier in this contemplative world. For a time my desire was sated, but soon the itch came back, I knew I had to find more love. Taoism gave me a big boost, the simple message of love and unity inspired me. The Tao displayed for me the simplicity of oneness. Fixed in my mind, was an image of a river flowing gracefully to the sea. No resistance, just peaceful reunification with the ONE. I wanted so very much to become that river, I had discovered in the Tao the desire to adjust my focus from love, to unconditional love.
I began a search of ancient wisdom. The roads to the ancients were truly a marvel. Phenomenal truth, from the work of true masters, is available for all seekers. An excellent example of this opportunity is represented in the teachings of Don Juan, as told by author Carlos Castaneda. Over the decades, books piled upon books. Truth, established in my mind by mere words, was transforming my reality into love.
As this new world more clearly emerged, my thirst for love found rockier, less travelled roads to follow. The libraries and bookstores seemed to have delivered all they could. I knew in my heart, I would have to leave words behind. I was afraid to take authority of my spiritual world. My role as seeker, meant I had given self empowerment away to authors who enriched my reality. I doubted my ability to be the master of my own truth. What I am expressing when I say this is, I came upon a crossroads. One road led me further down the seekers path of literature. The other led me to mind altering drugs which, I hoped, would enable me to learn the language of my heart. The decision was made, let the bookshelves collect dust for a while. I know my pure essence to be love, let me see where that goes.

Determined to experience love from within, I decided upon a course of action used mostly by tribal spiritual masters. Known to Shaman as a spirit or vision quest. Hallucinogenic drugs are used, in conjunction with intention, to seek truth in the form of communing with the heart.
There were a few different drugs for me to choose for this exercise. If I had my druthers, I would have used Ayahuasca with the guidance of a Shaman. This most beautiful concoction is known to spiritualists as the God drug. For centuries, Amazonian Shaman have used Ayahuasca as a window into the soul. The ritualistic sacrament is used to look within, searching for God self knowledge. Seeing as I could not afford the trip to the Amazon I had to lower my sights.
My second drug of choice would have been DMT. Researchers on the subject identify DMT as the spirit drug. Located in the Pineal gland, this chemical production facility is identified in Eastern spiritual tradition as the third eye. Ritualized meditative practice allows Eastern spiritual masters access the knowledge of the third eye. Much scientific experimentation has been conducted to determine the properties and benefits of this natural chemical. Medical doctors identify DMT in association with death and near death experiences. In the final moments of our death, our brain releases DMT from the Pineal gland, substantially altering the reality of the death experience. I decided against DMT as it is difficult to obtain and I have never used this drug. I could always migrate to these substances later in my search if need be.
In the end I had settle on a combination of two drugs I knew very well; LSD and magic mushrooms. I will leave the description of my experiment for later in our journey. For now, I will simply mention. Sitting by a fire, on the shore of a small lake in the Pacific Northwest, I experienced being God. The Grail was laid at my feet. My world shook from the depths of my being, never again would I question the ultimate truth that I am God, I am love, we all are. Imagine, if I am right, doesn't it just want to make you want to cry. In fact, when you embrace such power, crying is about all you can do. Relentless sobbing, for almost half an hour in my experience.

So, now that we have established I am just your chauffeur, having no authority at all. The limo engine is running, your bags are in the trunk. Allow me to open the door, we have a journey to commence. As we leave the city, let me take a few moments to share with you our itinerary. Oh, by the way, feel free to enjoy the chilled Champagne and snacks I have prepared. I thought a celebration was in order. After all, not many people have the courage to visit the exotic lands we will see. Oh yes, I can't forget the itinerary.
Our search will lead us to discover, scientifically and spiritually, a new world which has been intentionally hidden from your view. This new world will dazzle and amaze you my friend. You will find magic, adventure, thrills and chills you could never have imagined possible. When you discover the power which lays dormant at your feet, you will never again see the world as you do now. In this new world, you will find a bizarre reality that you are truly an immortal God. Hold your breath, everything is going to go upside down from here on in. The world you think you know is about to become very alien indeed. Much like Alice falling in the rabbit hole, it may be very difficult for you to reconcile what you are about to experience. I am not asking you believe the in the many marvels we will discover together. If truth is to be found in the alternate world I show you, your heart will know. My only desire, is that as we visit these foreign lands, take everything which will enable you to discover and embrace unconditional love. I would like to inform you that we have just crossed the reality border. Please note, on your right the welcome sign for ONEderland, population of ONE. You can unbuckle your seatbelt now, nothing can harm you here, in this world you are immortal.

This book is divided into three separate and distinct books; Our Mind In Chaos, Our Mind Beyond Illusion, Our Heart Embracing Love.

Book One: Our Mind in Chaos

The first book involves a detailed investigation into how humans perceive reality. I am sure you can establish, unequivocally, a demonstrable relationship between your past and future. No one would disagree the history of a boy forms the foundation of the man he will become. By example, it is well documented, many sexually abused children will manifest sexual abuse in their adult life. Turning the coin over, it is equally obvious, love, is the key to unlocking the vast potential of the human race. Extrapolating the obvious from this simple relationship of cause and effect, we can all agree; mankind would benefit from a focused effort to eradicate fear, in favor of, embracing love. Essentially, our world reflects itself as a dance of only two primary energies, love and fear. Our Mind In Chaos, will shine a spotlight on the unseen influences shaping the thoughts, feelings and emotions which drive your present reality. Your parents, the church, government, peers and many such influences certainly impact your perception of reality. We will determine if the sources which mold your reality justly deserve the authority you so liberally dispense.
The human mind works much like a computer. Two key factors will predict the capacity for efficiency and health; the accuracy of data you are programmed with and the operating system in place allowing you to read said data. The choices you make to accept or reject data is based on the authority you invest in the source, coupled with your ability to comprehend the complexity of data. If, after close inspection, you determine the sources of data you receive to be false, an opportunity for enlightenment will naturally present itself. Moreover, if the sources of data you receive are found to be deliberately corrupted, then your perspective of the world will be fundamentally altered.
When looking under the glare of a microscope at how you perceive reality, you can't help feeling like someone else is the true owner of your reality. If, after the chapter, you start to feel like you are not in control, then great gain has been made, you will have finally discovered truth.

To maintain a perspective on this issue I benefit from defining this truth as the monkey mind. In support of this metaphor, a mental image of a silly little monkey appears. Clad in organ grinders gear, he laughs at me with glittering eyes. Offering, for my benefit, a twist of a smile which clearly indicates he owns the domain of my reality. I usually laugh back and respond, " You silly little monkey, I see you, lets play! "
The long journey of gaining control over your mental faculties starts with accepting the reality of your monkey mind. Look closely at your life, are the choices you make really yours, or are your choices more a function of what you have been taught. There is no question mark at the end of the last rhetorical comment, the monkey is controlling your mind. From this pivotal revelation you can emphatically draw a line in the sand. No more, I won't have it, never again will I allow a monkey to drive me into the unconscious unknown! I will have my reality back, starting now!

The second chapter of book one will have us walk down the seldom traveled road to the home of ego. The subject of ego is revealed in countless books. Most current work represents a derivative of either Jungian or Freudian conceptual theory and analysis. The clinical world of psychology feels complete with their expansive, compartmentalized study of ego. We will take a deeper look into ego, by extending the boundaries to consider how ego uses, illusion, to strong arm your reality. Lets quickly touch base with the story of Alice In Wonderland. The first chapter about the monkey mind represents well Alice falling into the hole only to find herself in a strange room. In this second chapter about ego and illusion, Alice breaks out of the room to discover an alternate parallel universe called Wonderland. Possibly, I could use a more current pop culture example to better illustrate what chapter two of this book will truly represent to you the reader.
" Neo, it is time to choose, the red pill or the blue pill. "

Dearest reader, thus far, we have only discussed how you perceive reality, fairly harmless subject matter which won't hurt your ego too much. From this point on we take off the kid gloves, you can still walk away from this book. You can still remain asleep reader, your bed is warm and cosy, sleep is comfortable....

Now, before you put that red pill in your mouth friend, are you sure?

Quickly, you can still spit it out!

There you go, it's done now. You just had to swallow that red pill, didn't you? God help you, you've just helped yourself. You're hooked now, buckle up my friend. We are going for a very, very, extreme ride into the depths of your mind. If you're not ready for this reader, hold on tight, grit your teeth, feel free to close your eyes for the scary parts. I won't lie to you, this is going to hurt. I will make it quick using three simple words, a total of six letters which can change your entire world.

I AM GOD.

Say this out loud, try it on for size. I AM GOD, I AM GOD, I AM GOD. How does that make you feel reader?

If you are nodding your head in agreement, then you will love the rest of this book. It is always fun to share views with someone who can commune with your sentiments. If however it feels strange, awkward, silly, uncomfortable or possibly even sacrilegious for you to say I AM GOD, then the journey you take in completing this book will assist you in waking from the great sleep. Take solace in the fact you see the road ahead. The vast majority of the populous cannot see, they are meant to remain asleep. Your perspectives are about to change dramatically, the waking world expresses an entirely different reality than the world of dreams. Imagine what it would be like to be Alice visiting Wonderland or Neo living in the Matrix. This trip you are embarking on, my dear friend, is far more crazy and bizarre than anything either of those characters experienced. Alice and Neo both learned the world they came from was really just a dream. You too will come to the realisation your world is a dream. In this dream, you are the ultimate eternal creator of all reality.
Waking up by breaking free of illusion is no easy task. If we use the analogy of a a computer, it is not wrong to suggest you have been programmed your entire life with false data. This indoctrination of corrupt information has created a personal life story for you. You are presently using this infected program as a reference for everything you believe to be true. Your ego has a great deal invested in this story, in fact your ego has you convinced this story is your life. Ego will continually draw you back into the dream with another lullaby. In order to escape this back and forth dance with ego for control of reality, a new program must be written, as well, an updated operating system must be installed.

The first few bytes of the new program covers the illusion of separation. We believe ourselves to be separate from each other. I sit at my computer writing this book, some time in the future you are reading my thoughts. You hear your partner or children in the next room as you read this sentence, everything you know to be true screams out for you to trust and believe in separation. This my dear friend is truly an illusion, proven beyond any reasonable doubt spiritually, and if need be, scientifically. There is no me and you, no us and them, there is only the ONE. It may help to imagine the sun refracting through the many facets of a crystal hanging in the kitchen window. The sun represents God, the crystal has over six billion facets, each leaving a distinct signature of light. You are that signature of light, you are God. It is good to consider this metaphor of light, it represents a subtle segue into the next part of the chapter.

Your body does not exist, nor does the world you believe you are experiencing. Please take a breath reader, try and absorb what this means. The aforementioned statement will be validated spiritually and scientifically for your consideration in books two and three. It is understandably difficult to wrap your head around the idea that the physical world does not exist, other than as an illusion. You can see yourself sitting in a chair, you drive your car to work, your partner is in the next room watching television. You have a home, children, a life, there is a planet called Earth. Everyone knows all this stuff is real, right?

I can just imagine what your ego must be saying right about now.

" Someone shoot this author in the foot, he will soon figure out what is real, right? How can this idiot try and convince me my life, this chair, my sweet Mercedes Benz, my half million dollar mortgage, my kids are not real? He expects me to believe this is all just an illusion. Created by an ego which has me convinced I am him. Some monkey thing, dancing around with me, what a load of crap, right? This guy is nuts, his elevator isn't making it to the top floor. I gotta toss this book, he really is off his rocker. "

How does it feel Neo? Is your stomach turning, your head spinning, do you want off this ride Neo?

Lets move on then, you feel there is need, you wish to express desire. Everyday you look around and see how you fail to make the grade. Your neighbor has a bigger home, driving a spiffier car. You see other people with hotter partners, bigger breasts, better build. It's okay, I guess, because you are not exactly a superstar yourself. Your career is okay, but not as good as it should be. Everyone seems to have a better life, why not me? Why can't I have my cake and eat it too? I want to be on top for a change. I deserve it! Accept or deny your lot in life deep down you want more. More widgets, whats its, do hickeys and gadgets. Better, sexier, smarter, faster, newer, just give me more and make it better. Hell, while your at it, make me better, it's my turn. Ego shouts these words during the day and whispers them at night, day or night you sleep. The illusions of want and need are expressed as a natural derivative of separation. As long as we continue to hold on to the illusion we are separate, we will always establish comparisons which invariable leaves us wanting. Seeing beyond the curtain of this illusion is a challenge. The cornerstone of this understanding must leave you with the knowledge you already possess everything. Naturally you may think, " I can barely cover the mortgage. My daughter needs braces, my car just blew a motor sitting in the interstate traffic jam last Tuesday. My credit cards are maxed, by Friday I have to decide between food or hydro because I can't afford both. " Once again dear reader, we can come to understand these thoughts arise from the breath of ego.

Hey Neo, relax, take it easy, it will all make sense later. You don't have to wake up so fast, you don't have to wake up at all. There is no need, everything is perfect already, you are the ONE Neo.

Keeping close company with the illusions of want and need is the illusion of good and bad, manifesting itself, in the form of Judgment. You judge all day, everyday, you know this to be true . Be honest, we all do, the ego is very adept at using the tool of judgment. Judgment, in every ones life, becomes a sharp sword with which ego wreaks considerable damage. Judgment is an illusion which often stands on the loftiest of grounds. Pride and vanity must remain firm in knowing it is right in the dispensation of justice. Ego will separate and compare every part of your reality. Scales are set up for you, everything is weighed, value is firmly assessed to each item. Good and bad do battle, all in the name of determining the winner. The only constant is, everyone ends up a loser, ego holds sway ruling over all.

How are you doing Alice? Settling into Wonderland are you? Yes it most certainly can be a little scary, don't worry. It is, after all, just a dream.

There, did you see him! The monkey, he just ran by. The clang of his symbols are still ringing in my ears, laughing while he weaves the illusions of time and death. It is easy for ego to use such illusion to further it's magical deception. You can look back on your life in review of your accomplishments and failures. More importantly, there is great comfort in expecting a future. From the moment of your birth, to the moment of reading this book, you can chronologically establish time to have passed. From this perspective, it is only logical to assume you have a given amount of time left before you die. You're old enough to understand people are born so eventually they will die, everyone dies, right?. Like most people, you desire to lead a good life, filled with accomplishment, success and love. You may hope to leave a legacy to be proud of, so that when you are gone people would say. " There you go, she was a good lass. " You are not sure what will happen when you die, but you hope all goes well, maybe God will reward your efforts. No one knows what happens when we die, it's all up to God, right?
These would all be reasonable assumptions to make if you were under the spell of ego. This, however, is not the case. By virtue of the fact you are still reading this book, it is fair to assume you are beginning to see the monkey. Take a moment, laugh at the monkey. Let him know you can see his illusion. As much as you may be convinced time exists, it most certainly does not. Past, future, birth and death are illusions used by the monkey which instill fear. No fear is unusable in the monkey's world, fear is the sword he wields to dominate your reality.
You will never die, in fact you were never born. You are God, experiencing being. God in the eternal moment of now. When you identify with illusions of time, space and the material world you end up with a very shallow reason for life. Look beyond these veils of illusion, see the spectacular beauty before you. Pretend, if you have to, that everything you are reading is true. Just imagine the impact this can have on your life! Imagine how freeing it will be when you determine the true nature of reality! Nothing is more empowering than the discovery of truth, it will always lead to love.
The final blockbuster revelation represents well a culmination of the many aspects of illusion we have covered thus far. I say this because it is the illusion of an external world. We have established ego as a master spinner of illusion, his magic dazzles the eyes and boggles the mind. One more trick up the monkey's sleeve is in his ability to convince you the world exists outside and separate from you.
To see beyond this illusion, you must conclude all manifest reality to be an expression from within you. You are God, you are everything. From the tiniest microbe to the greatest galaxy all reality exists within you. You are the dog, the duck, the tree and the moon. There is truly nothing in all existence which you are not. I know how you must feel my dearest reader, this stuff is exhausting. Take a break, stretch you mind and body, refresh yourself. You have just started down this lonesome road, there are many miles yet to travel, pace yourself my friend.

I foretold of thrills and chills, an unimaginable ride into the extreme reaches of your mind. I suggested you would find a Wonderland, that you would step out of the Matrix in shocked disbelief of the world you see. I am sure you have noticed, almost everything is completely different in this reality. Not at all like you have been taught, is it? You must have many questions, it is difficult walking with these new legs, the footing can be difficult to manage. I feel impelled to ask, as the preface for book one draws to a close, how do you feel? What is your ego telling you? What is your heart telling you? Book one concludes with observations and applications which will hopefully help define for you how this new version of reality can benefit your daily experience of being God. Namaste, my friends, take a bow, it is not easy to walk this road. I understand your caution and trepidation. We all have a great deal invested in the ego " I ". It is only the strong of heart who can let this energy go.