astrological self diagnosis
posted by PBilly | April 1, 2009
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IcerocketI thought it was about time for a little astro-narcissism...
Since discovering astrology, I've found that perhaps one of the most sensitive configurations of my natal chart that has implicitly correlated to a particularly strong part of my experience is the relationship created by the placement of the Sun, Mercury, and Saturn.
Sun (27 degrees 17' Aquarius in the sixth house) conjunct Mercury (24 degrees 40' Aqu/6th) both square to Saturn (27 degrees 48' Scorpio in the third house) - Saturn is also conjunct my south node.
The following is my attempt to write about this...
As I grow in understanding and increase my ability for hindsight, I've found that much of my life has revolved around the 'conflict' of the abstract and the material, the self and the other, the inherent duality in all things. The greatest kinds of knowledge and perceptions that I have accumulated and experienced over time seem to have had the inclination of a feeling more than the coldness of an abstract concept. These feelings are aroused by ideas that seem to attach themselves to my core and burst out with insight and a sense of elevation. It's almost as if I can feel the potential of a complete understanding, and more importantly an experience, of the veil of duality being lifted.
At this point, I feel that I am unable to recognize that experience of illumination because I am bound to this duality and any insight beyond it lies only in abstract concepts and distant images. I imagine that I am face to face with the Guardian of the Threshold. Up to this point it seems that the only way to 'overcome' this obstacle is to gorge this 'demon' with endless efforts of gaining knowledge and understanding. With this feeling of being beckoned into the Temple, I pore over books and films and obsessively meditate on concepts searching for meaning in all places.
Am I a part of an unconscious ritual that has taken a life of its own, using me as an ignorant puppet in blind mimicking and repetition as my body and soul wither away? Or am I a conscious participant in an alchemical process aiming towards the 'sacred marriage' of the true nature of reality? I know in myself that I will never recognize that I am a conscious participant until I feel it the center of my being.
Comments
You are already there!
— Apr 03, 2009
i find the most profound statement in your writing to be, "It's almost as if I can feel the potential of a complete understanding, and more importantly an experience..." YES! the experience is more important indeed! i go back and forth daily on my concept of "understanding" and today i feel that understanding is something that only applies to the world of the senses. not to say that the world of the senses is distinct from the world beyond the senses, but the pretty lights and shadows that manifest for us can be explored as a phenomenon in thier own right. If you haven't read any of Schopenhauer, i would suggest him. He expands on some of Kant's ideas in some very insightful (albeit sometimes a little depressing) ways. But yes, i feel that the world beyond the senses is only available to us through experience, not intellectual comprehension. but hey, you don't need to understand something to accept it.
peace and love
-Yadreep Bob
box it up...
— Apr 06, 2009
Hey...thanks for reading! One of the things that I constantly take for granted is the value of experiencing things, especially the initial experience, without immediately trying to conceptualize and categorize. I can see how this desire has alienated me, over time, from directly experiencing things in the fresh, creative ways that I did during the moment of discovery. I have come across some of Schopenhauer's general ideas referenced in books that I have read. He's definitely on my list of things to read. Peace out!
Swinging on the tail of the Dragon!
— Apr 08, 2009
You feel that...? No, seriously...its its its....you don't feel that? I do!!!
First of all, I would love to see your whole chart! I am an Evolutionary Astrologer, and I find your experiences as "being a Puppet" to this endless quest for knowledge so interesting in regards to the fact saturn is conjunct your SN in the 3rd. Where is your pluto and Neptune? But from what I can gather is that you are no doubt on to it, you are just burning of some Karmic calories. In the end you will find the One thing which works for you in Uniting with Other or God and you will be able to glance back to where you are now and Howl with Laughter...Keep it up brother and contact me with your chart if you want a little more insight.
Namaste
Thrashing on the tail of the Dragon is more like it...
— Apr 09, 2009
Yo, Entheo! I'll send you my birth data. With Saturn conjunct the South Node in my third house, I suspect that I have a tendency to hit the proverbial brick wall with my instinctual thought patterns and get bogged down in what seems to be the quagmire of the intellect. This (note the North Node is in the ninth house) may prevent me from letting lose and intuiting the "bigger picture" and allowing myself to absorb mental influences from outside of myself. Just some thoughts. Pluto is in Scorpio in my second house. Neptune is in Capricorn in my fourth house. Uranus is closely conjunct my IC. I've been experiencing quite actively the Neptune Aquarius transit right on my natal Sun/Mercury conjunction for awhile now. I'm in anticipation what the upcoming Neptune/Chiron/Jupiter conjunction will have in store for me...
I feel that your sudden
— Apr 24, 2010
I feel that your sudden strokes of cosmic insight that change your whole base of being relate to your Uranus being on your IC.
Cool post, I'm a Mercury-Saturn-Sun myself (conjunction). Saturn on the South Node sounds interesting. I often wish I could become the consciousness of other people to understand astrology better.
