Is life's drama inherently wise?

A popular idea amongst many who study various yoga’s, is the idea that our personal story- our life’s drama- arises out of our habitual tendency to recoil away from totality and confide in a false ego sense of “I”. Personally, I see a great deal of truth in this. Much of the un-needed suffering in my life has been a direct result of my refusal to let go of this “drama” I call my life. My personal story acts as a filter of absolute reality contriving it into a web of events that deal directly to a “me”. This makes sense and is verifiable.

From another perspective, there have been many events in my life that I would definitely say had a “spiritually” significant meaning behind them. I’m finding difficulty differentiating between what’s actually significant, and what’s actually a trick of my ego is to inflate itself.

Many of the “non-dual” schools aren’t very clear on this. On the one had you have “there Is no self” etc but on the other, sayings like “when the student is ready the teacher will appear” (something that has happened quite often in my life, at least I think ?) Although I’ve experienced quite a bit of “synchronicity” I can definitely see a huge danger in this. Viewing everything in the universe as some sort of cosmic sign to guide or teach you can lead to all sorts of delusional sorts of thinking, such as perceiving oneself as messianic type figure (which I feel has happened to quite a few well known teachers).

Author Robert Anton Wilson was big on the notion of everyone having their own reality tunnels. So “perceiving” the universe as constantly giving me clues to help me along will actually make it reality. My question is where one draws the line between constantly looking for feedback from the universe, and simply relaxing into the ever present moment. Another popular idea of this is the archetype of “the hero’s journey”. Perhaps it’s a matter of maturity to simply drop notions such as these to expand beyond your sense of self. Although helpful, it seems ways of perceiving similar to these have potential to guide the individual to grow but also strengthen our already rigid sense of self.